On the Effect of Chennai Summer on Shaving Cream Containers

Abstract: [This is a technical note. It doesn't require an abstract]

Introduction:

Shaving is an act of curtailing growth since time immemorial. For instance, it is reported in Valmiki Ramayana [1] that even Rama shaved, upon his return from vanavasa (exile). Shaving creams are recent reluctant aides to literally cover the spoils of this ancient act. However, because of their high "free energy" (as in they behave the way they like when set free), they are usually contained using metal containers sealed with thumb depressors and marked "shake well after use". This study investigates using experiments, the effect of the Chennai Summer on such containers. The outcome should somehow affect directly shaving in general and shavers in particular.

Experiment:

Experimenters were conducted (performed, as suggested by the reviewer [2]) in uncontrolled conditions in a typical Chennai home well soaked in Summer. The apparatus consisted of Shaving Cream container, Flat table and a High end, you-Poor-Indian-Guys (pig for short)-can't afford, NRI gifted, US Junk Mall discount sale purchased, real time reality digitizer cum pixelizer.

The experiment is performed with the rest of the apparatus kept vertical but the digitizer kept horizontal , a direct result of inefficient lab technicians who don't realize the big picture of where their experiments fall into in the vast cauldron of human refuse.

Results:

[Experiment Results]

Discussion:

Chennai Summer is very hot, unlike Chennai Winter, which is just hot. This is only expected given the seasons of Chennai - Hot, Hotter and Hottest.

[Image Courtesy: Globalwarmingart.com]

Given such favorable conditions, animate or inanimate, things behave bizarre. This is clearly shown in the above experimental results.

It can be observed that in Chennai summer, shaving cream containers froth and die a painful death.

The experiment is unrepeatable as things behave unpredictably in Chennai summer. Further experiments (with coke and pepsi containers shaken well before use) are necessary to fritter summer time this way, as thinking at super heated neuron conditions becomes thoughtless.

Conclusion:

Its damn hot in Chennai, you know. It is May and it is already 108 Fahrenheit (or is it Celsius).

Acknowledgment:

I thank the prudent reviewer who pointed out [2] that there is no apparent connection between the title, content and conclusion of this note and once it is established it can be considered for rubbish. I agree the reviewer is correct in the assessment but misses the point of the note completely. I take extreme pleasure (paroxysms of joy, to use Ramesh Mahadevan's [3] patented phraseology) in not trying to establish any connection whatsoever. Once done, as the reviewer points out, this note would become rubbish. I have answered the reviewer in kind [4].

References

[1] Ramayana, by Valmiki, Parchment Publishers, circa 20000 BC give or take a few centuries, [Original out of print - ask Advaniji for whereabouts]

[2] Reviewer (name kept anonymous) report for "On the Effect of Chennai Summer on Shaving Cream Containers" [declined for acceptance - see [4] below]

[3] Ramesh Mahadevan, father (and mother) of all Indian internet humour (notice the u).

[4] the author reply in full.

Related posts:

1. Your Review is Hereby Summarily Rejected
2. Coanda Effect